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10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid

These days, we tend to communicate via the keyboard as much as we do verbally. Often, we’re in a hurry, quickly dashing off e-mails with typos, grammatical shortcuts (I’m being kind here), and that breezy, e.e. cummings, no-caps look. It’s expected. It’s no big deal. But other times, we try to invest a little care, avoiding mistakes so that there’s no confusion about what we’re saying and so that we look professional and reasonably bright.In general, we can slip up in a verbal conversation and get away with it. A colleague may be thinking, Did she just say “irregardless”?, but the words flow on, and our worst transgressions are carried away and with luck, forgotten.

That’s not the case with written communications. When we commit a grammatical crime in e-mails, discussion posts, reports, memos, and other professional documents, there’s no going back. We’ve just officially gone on record as being careless or clueless. And here’s the worst thing. It’s not necessary to be an editor or a language whiz or a spelling bee triathlete to spot such mistakes. They have a way of doing a little wiggle dance on the screen and then reaching out to grab the reader by the throat.

So here we are in the era of Word’s red-underline “wrong spelling, dumb ass” feature and Outlook’s Always Check Spelling Before Sending option, and still the mistakes proliferate. Catching typos is easy (although not everyone does it). It’s the other stuff — correctly spelled but incorrectly wielded — that sneaks through and makes us look stupid. Here’s a quick review of some of the big ones.

Note: This information is also available as a TechRepublic article and as a PDF download.

#1: Loose for lose

No: I always loose the product key.

Yes: I always lose the product key.

#2: It’s for its (or God forbid, its’)

No: Download the HTA, along with it’s readme file.

Yes: Download the HTA, along with its readme file.

No: The laptop is overheating and its making that funny noise again.

Yes: The laptop is overheating and it’s making that funny noise again.

#3: They’re for their for there

No: The managers are in they’re weekly planning meeting.

Yes: The managers are in their weekly planning meeting.

No: The techs have to check there cell phones at the door, and their not happy about it.

Yes: The techs have to check their cell phones at the door, and they’re not happy about it.

#4: i.e. for e.g.

No: Use an anti-spyware program (i.e., Ad-Aware).

Yes: Use an anti-spyware program (e.g., Ad-Aware).

Note: The term i.e. means “that is”; e.g. means “for example.” And a comma follows both of them.

#5: Effect for affect

No: The outage shouldn’t effect any users during work hours.

Yes: The outage shouldn’t affect any users during work hours.

Yes: The outage shouldn’t have any effect on users.

Yes: We will effect several changes during the downtime.

Note: Impact is not a verb. Purists, at least, beg you to use affect instead:

No: The outage shouldn’t impact any users during work hours.

Yes: The outage shouldn’t affect any users during work hours.

Yes: The outage should have no impact on users during work hours.

#6: You’re for your

No: Remember to defrag you’re machine on a regular basis.

Yes: Remember to defrag your machine on a regular basis.

No: Your right about the changes.

Yes: You’re right about the changes.

#7: Different than for different from

No: This setup is different than the one at the main office.

Yes: This setup is different from the one at the main office.

Yes: This setup is better than the one at the main office.

#8 Lay for lie

No: I got dizzy and had to lay down.

Yes: I got dizzy and had to lie down.

Yes: Just lay those books over there.

#9: Then for than

No: The accounting department had more problems then we did.

Yes: The accounting department had more problems than we did.

Note: Here’s a sub-peeve. When a sentence construction begins with If, you don’t need a then. Then is implicit, so it’s superfluous and wordy:

No: If you can’t get Windows to boot, then you’ll need to call Ted.

Yes: If you can’t get Windows to boot, you’ll need to call Ted.

#10: Could of, would of for could have, would have

No: I could of installed that app by mistake.

Yes: I could have installed that app by mistake.

No: I would of sent you a meeting notice, but you were out of town.

Yes: I would have sent you a meeting notice, but you were out of town.

Bonus peeve

I’ll just throw one more thing out here: My current burning pet peeve. At some point, who knows when, it became common practice to say that something is “hit and miss.” Nuh-UH. It can’t be both, right? It either hits or it misses…. “Hit OR miss.” Granted, it’s a small thing, a Boolean-obsessive sort of thing. But it’s nonetheless vexing because it’s so illogical. Okay, that’s mine. If you’ve got a peeve of your own, share it in the discussion (or post a comment and tell me to get over it).

You might also want to check out this long-running discussion to see what grammar gaffes have driven your peers around the bend.

Jody Gilbert has been writing and editing technical articles for the past 20 years, including a stint with The Cobb Group/ZD Journals. She's been with TechRepublic since Day One. Read her full bio and profile.

Print/View all Posts Comments on this blog

Peeve: 'could care less' robert.paul@... | 03/06/08
A Lot Jim Doss | 03/06/08
Peeve - People who are Picky about grammar blazing-biz@... | 03/12/08
bravo Moejj | 03/12/08
grammar/English majors dhays | 12/17/08
Corrections Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
don't care about English usage? thebearwoman2004@... | 03/12/08
grammar is important qcapricorn@... | 03/13/08
Is that physically? neale.dowling@... | 12/17/08
Amen bearwoman! john3347@... | 12/17/08
"spectical" = spectacle or sceptical? gbentley@... | 03/13/08
I agree, in a way wolfanotaku@... | 03/21/08
Glaring Example 1611kjb@... | 03/21/08
For Me, Generosity of Spirit Trumps Perfect Grammar ZDNet_crx@... | 04/05/08
Company, or those with whom we break bread santeewelding | 04/05/08
1611kjb?s response fnoy@... | 12/17/08
Not devoid of errors... mroerdink@... | 04/07/08
Reply Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
eschew skershaw@... | 08/25/09
Grammar = Success Mindtickler | 10/01/08
Making other people look stupid ??? fnoy@... | 12/17/08
Communication djelliott@... | 12/17/08
WRONG GRAMMAR DOES MATTER! jose.schmoe@... | 12/26/08
How like an enclosure santeewelding | 12/26/08
Pot calls kettle black. boxfiddler | 12/26/08
And dummies never would confuse jdclyde | 12/26/08
Some folks just will not get it! desizemo@... | 09/15/09
It's about overt ignorance Oz_Media | 09/15/09
this bugs me a lot! tchblue5@... | 04/23/08
One of my pet peeves.... kermidge | 03/07/08
empower wolfanotaku@... | 03/21/08
Nouns turned into verbs...IT speak...present conditional tense danielle.marino@... | 07/09/08
Noun to Verb to Noun DonG43 | 12/17/08
Flaming tempers! drnspot@... | 08/07/08
Posting one's life story and views... jmolina03@... | 10/01/08
Sry due i cn't accpt that butkus@... | 12/17/08
IM or Text? Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
Near hit or near miss? khoib@... | 12/17/08
Easy if you think about it. gcalderon71@... | 08/21/09
Agreed msanger@... | 12/19/08
Hate to tell you but jkrause@... | 09/26/09
What do I think? NickNielsen | 03/06/08
A life of its own... JodyGilbertTechrepublic Moderator | 03/06/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid lvn | 03/06/08
grammar, spelling dhays | 12/17/08
LOLOLOL Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid Kjell_Andorsen | 03/06/08
people use X2 negative incorrectly Moejj | 03/06/08
Answering a negative question in the affirmative. RFink | 03/06/08
Too True Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
Misused or fabricated words jhcampbe@... | 03/06/08
WELL! Moejj | 03/06/08
irregardless dhays | 12/17/08
I occasionally find myself using irregardless in speech. OnTheRopes | 12/17/08
I tell ya santeewelding | 12/17/08
More "Misused or fabricated words" (sic). pir8_bob@... | 03/29/08
I guess it wasn't this group who voted for George W. Bush ZDNet_crx@... | 04/05/08
More fabricated words drbayer | 08/05/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid jtaylor3678@... | 03/06/08
Spell checking Bizzo | 03/06/08
GUFFAW drbayer | 08/05/08
Gender neutral pronouns RFink | 03/06/08
its jdclyde | 03/06/08
True, but RFink | 03/06/08
not in all cases jdclyde | 03/06/08
OMIGOD - I'm agreeing with JD about English grammar neilb@... | 03/06/08
Student is a noun. RFink | 03/06/08
But, (and be aware that I do own up to MAJOR pedantry) neilb@... | 03/06/08
The student vs. A student RFink | 03/07/08
It is not unknown jdclyde | 03/07/08
"A student left his book in the library" neilb@... | 03/07/08
OHHISGOD! That's the second time... neilb@... | 03/07/08
There's no ownership RFink | 03/07/08
duely noted jdclyde | 03/07/08
Students and books neilb@... | 03/07/08
reasons unknown? naomi37@... | 03/26/08
When Political Correctness mangles the English Language Brian Doe | 10/03/08
Very nice ZDNet_crx@... | 04/05/08
spelling dhays | 12/17/08
If we know the identity of the student... drbayer | 08/05/08
Grammar or typo? kdust111@... | 03/06/08
Punctuation and quotes jkiernan@... | 03/28/08
True, but since the digital age..... ZDNet_crx@... | 04/05/08
Living Things? ZDNet_crx@... | 04/05/08
I will not bite neilb@... | 03/06/08
No...Yes lvn | 03/06/08
Quote correction SKDTech | 03/07/08
Disagree lvn | 03/12/08
LOL! Viren.Aggarwal@... | 03/27/08
Gender exclusive Synaptik/Chaos | 03/07/08
True "English 101...". pir8_bob@... | 03/29/08
Colloquial? DaveDopp | 12/17/08
Peeve: 'If and When' cholt2064@... | 03/06/08
If and when .... junk4katie@... | 03/19/08
If and When john3347@... | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid wayne_ono@... | 03/06/08
I have a couple pstanley@... | 03/07/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid SKDTech | 03/07/08
10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid glennm@... | 03/10/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid absinthe@... | 03/10/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid CECS | 03/10/08
Loan vs Lend tigwyk@... | 03/10/08
Farther and Further bighair1204@... | 11/18/08
Suggestion, Big Hair santeewelding | 11/18/08
Thank you for your help bighair1204@... | 11/18/08
As usual santeewelding | 11/18/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid GrumpyGGA@... | 03/19/08
More peeves junk4katie@... | 03/19/08
Anyways naomi37@... | 03/26/08
grammer half@... | 10/03/08
word usage dhays | 12/17/08
"different than" vs. "different from" and "impact" jkiernan@... | 03/28/08
YES - impact Cactus Pete | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid grooIT | 04/01/08
10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid alkesh.patel@... | 04/04/08
Doable jkiernan@... | 04/22/08
Grammer? joycloete@... | 10/03/08
doable dhays | 12/17/08
"begs the question" bob@... | 05/10/08
Peeve: "Bring" vs "Take" robert.d.cook@... | 11/18/08
I may not be reading this correctly... mr.grant.wilson@... | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid chittaranjan.kaul@... | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid john3347@... | 12/17/08
damp vs dampen dhays | 12/17/08
Good versus Well DonG43 | 12/17/08
My peeve - "got" Cactus Pete | 12/17/08
reply Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
Ebonics Strange Wu Tang | 12/17/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid HLSatHaven | 12/22/08
Of kings and battle santeewelding | 12/22/08
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid peyton.lewis@... | 01/05/09
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid Teapotty | 08/21/09
Speak...Clearly or Legibly? ThreeLittleBirds | 08/21/09
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid AHUFFTB11108@... | 08/21/09
RE: 10 flagrant grammar mistakes that make you look stupid Bill Berry | 11/16/09

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